Collapse · the · Light · into · the · Earth

That's about it for now.

Much Love
-Seraphina (new name)-

Current Mood:

horny

Gripped by a sudden sadness, I must not let myself fall in mortal anguish. I shall see the past as it really was.

I rise above myself, above lifeless reality, my feet in subterranean fire, my brow in the moving stars.

Entranced by a strange nearness, I look through a dark veil and see an enchanted shore and an enchanted distance. Hidden mysteries have been entrusted to me. 

Is a whirlwind blowing from the sea? Or are fabulous birds from paradise singing amongst the leaves? Is time standing still? Do you remember? Do you remember in our sleepy bay the world became wider and more alluring?

Is there a gold more heavenly than ours? Can the wasp of a bullet sting us now? Our songs are our weapons...ringing voices...our gold.

I shed a tear for what once was, just one tear, for those white shores, and for love on the banks of the river.

Perhaps my dignity is my curse, but I won't have it tampered with. I never asked (nor would I ask) for anything except truth. That's all I need here, because right now, the only perspective I have is her angry, violent messages(which are progressively getting more unpleasant and graphic), and her angry, violent statements about you and me. I have my own perspective of course, but I need yours.

*Mounts black steed, grabs sword, and heads out into this crazy world to complete this noble quest.* 

Tonight, the air is deep and black, a blanket of thick anticipation. I draw in a breath. My hands are shaking, though not from the cold, and I must take a moment to ground myself. A strand of hair falls in front of my eyes, and I nervously brush it away. My fingers are thankful for the task. My surroundings try to comfort me, relaxing the sky, emphasizing the playful tickle of the breeze, and I smile slightly, feeling less tense despite myself. I can't quite grasp the origin of my discomfort, but it has something to do with childhood memories and a voice in my dreams. There was a dark cave, and when I lived there, I was angry. I was consumed by strange and twisted things, by an unquenchable thirst. The memories are dark and desolate ones, painfully contrasting the white light and the soft music. They come into my mind for a reason tonight, to remind me of what I have sworn to leave behind. Power is a savage temptress, a lover with a poison tongue. Sometimes I still desire it, moments like these when there are things that I so desperatly want, but I let the moonlight bathe my face and remind myself that I must use my strength differently, that I must never again let myself sink into darkness. These moments of struggle are natural, beautiful even. Each time I overcome these dangerous lusts of mine, I am reminded of the distance I have traveled, the realizations I've come to, the victories I've won. I will not sufficate myself with blackness ever again. Now I know where the true Power lies.

Determined and forceful
Emotional and intuitive
Powerful and passionate
Exciting and magnetic
Jealous and resentful
Compulsive and obsessive
Secretive and obstinate

Scorpios are the most intense, profound, powerful characters in the zodiac. Even when they appear self-controlled and calm there is a seething intensity of emotional energy under the placid exterior. They need great self-discipline, because they are able to recognize the qualities in themselves that make them different from other humans, and know their natures can be used for great good, or great evil. They are fortunate in that their strong reasoning powers are tempered with imagination and intuition, and these gifts can enable the Scorpions to penetrate to profundities beyond the average. But charismatic "twice-born" characters such as they can sink into the extremes of depravity if they take the wrong path, and the intensity of their nature exaggerates their harmful tendencies into vices far greater than the normal. Scorpio is the symbol of sex and Scorpios are passionate lovers, the most sensually energetic of all the signs. They are capable of the greatest heights of passionate transport, but debauchery and perversion are always dangers, and Scorpios can become sadistic monsters of sensuality and eroticism. 

LIKES
• Truth
• Hidden Causes
• Being involved
• Work That is Meaningful
• Being Persuasive

DISLIKES
• Being Given Only Surface data
• Taken Advantage of
• Demeaning Jobs
• Shallow relationships

Mysterious Opals contain the wonders of the skies - sparkling rainbows, fireworks, and lightning, shifting and moving in their depths. Opal has been treasured throughout history all around the world. Archaeologist Louis Leakey found six-thousand year old Opal artifacts in a cave in Kenya! It is an old myth that anyone who does not have the opal as a starstone will be the receivers of bad luck should they choose to wear it.


Many Scorpios possess a suspicious outlook, and need to know the reasons behind everything. Scorpio does nothing in half measures. An all or nothing attitude permeates their entire life. When fixed on something or someone, the scorpion perseveres. 
Scorpio imagination and intuition are excellent. In addition, they seem to demonstrate a natural healing power. 

Flowers:
Geranium, Honeysuckle

Herbs:
Aloe, Witch Hazel

Countries:
Norway, Syria,
Algeria, Zambia

Cities:
New Orleans,
Washington DC,
Liverpool, Halifax

Body Area:
Regenerative Organs

Principle:
Regeneration

Keywords:
Intense, Passionate,
Jealous

 Most Scorpios, if they dare be so revealing, would confess of an ongoing internal conflict between two distinct aspects of their nature.

I 've written a lot of story number one, titled "Black Sheet Party," which contains BDSM merged with some fantastical elements. The plot follows a few different couplings that take place over the course of a night, each centered around a fantasy that unfolds, and each strangely connected to something larger that's happening within the house. I am LOVING it so far. I'm having such fun writing it, I'm incorporating all these crazy wild elements that, for some reason, all seem to flow right into each other so the plot actually works. I've got bondage, vampires, sadism, secret portals, seduction, dungeons, and more. Hehe, good stuff ;).

Other than that, dropped off my Wild Oats application (finally), still haven't finished my Loyola app because of the damn resume, but I'll either do that today or tomorrow. Still trying to figure out what my living arrangements are going to be in N.O, and still attempting to clean my room, which looks like ground zero.

For some reason today I've got itchy feet like you wouldn't believe. I know I've only been home for two weeks (not even), but the road is calling to me, constantly whispering to me. Last night we all played Apples to Apples, and I picked up a card that said "New Orleans," yet another sign.

In other news, Becki is homicidal right now, so I'm trying to keep her at bay. I hear her storming around downstairs, swearing to herself, and all I can do is let her ride it out. Sometimes, one of us just needs to let loose, and we've reached a complete mutual understanding about that.

I'm quite hungover, so I'm about to take a nap, or....a hot bath....mmm...that's what I'll do, a hot bubble bath. Perfect.

This is all to be discovered.

I woke up this morning to my dog pawing the side of my bed, like she used to do when she was a puppy. I kissed her nose, and we played together on the floor for a while. I still have a fever, and I feel slightly delerious, but that's really the only symptom of whatever this is. I'm quite restless, and I want to run through the woods today and sit by the stream, singing whatever comes into my head. Even though I'm still wearing what I rolled out of bed in, and my hair looks like it has a life of its own, and I'm feverish, I feel beautiful. I feel...happy. As the night of double power approaches, I feel my energy surging within me, growing stronger with each passing second. Today, I'll try to let my body heal a little more, perhaps I'll get some more writing done, and I still have many plans to make for New Orleans. Some plans I'll hold off on, because they may be subject to change?

As to our conversation last night, here is another little piece of advice. We're about to transition away from the material into the spiritual, so now is the time for us to start listening to our energy, to our intuition.

When we let spirit lead us,
It is impossible to know where we are being led.
All we know,
All we can believe,
All we can hope,
Is that we are going home,
That wherever Spirit takes us
Is where
We
Live.

I'm sick today =(, temp of 102, which is why I'm lying here posting a thousand blogs, because I have nothing better to do. My entire day has been spent writing and watching porn. Yes. I feel no shame. Speaking of porn...I've been writing a little series of erotic short stories about less conventional sexual experiences, which, needless to say, I'm having fun with. Everyone has fantasies, and I don't mean the generic fantasies. I mean the ones that make you glad that the people around you don't have mind-reading abilities. Some of these stories are based off of my own fantasies, and others are based off of my conversations with others. The title (as of now) is Roses and Rapture, with each individual story having a title of its own. This isn't just mindless writing for the sake of sexual gratification. I have a really strong purpose behind the entire thing, and I want to cast these stories in an Empowering light. If you have anything that you'd feel comfortable contributing, whether a personal fantasy, an experience, or thoughts/critisism directed towards the idea in general, please feel free to send me a message. I have a few other projects that I'm working on as well right now, which I'll describe in more detail soon. Thanks!